Can you believe I have a freshman?! Yup. THE BOY IS A FRESHMAN! This kid is getting so old. Yikes. But anyway, let me tell you about his first day of school! Man, was it something.
homeschool or home school
The Boy has been a high school freshman for nine weeks! Already time for intercession, in fact. Yeah, I can’t believe it either. Not gonna sugarcoat it – it started off as a massive sh*t show. The poor guy was so anxiety ridden, he was looking into homeschool options. Not me. Him. Seriously, his search history was wild in the saddest way. Y’all… It was a rough time.
He was already in a pre-panic mode because he wasn’t going to the high school he wanted. They had rejected his transfer request and I had to break the news he had to attend our home school. Our home campus has a bad rap (only 1/2 earned) and everything he heard about from their rival school (the one he wanted to attend). None of it was good. The Boy was acting like he was being sent to a prison from some 80’s movies I probably shouldn’t let him watch. Truly.
The spiral in the car was something… it went from “It’s fine, we did our best and the man said I can request again next year” to tattooed gangsters starting riots.
TB: “I don’t know anyone there. I won’t have any friends.”
Me: “You’ll meet new friends.”
TB: “Oh sure like that’s easy. What if I do make friends? What if I meet these people and they’re the wrong crowd and before I know it, I accidentally joined a gang?!”
Me: “That’s actually not how gangs work. I love that’s how you think they work, but no. And if you do accidentally join a gang, just be the best gangster you can be. I would love for you to join some extracurriculars”
*insert withering teen stare here*
TB: “I heard students just start rioting and beating each other for no reason.”
Me: “I doubt that. There’s always a reason.”
TB: “WHY WOULD THEY HAVE A REASON TO BEAT EACH OTHER IN CLASS?!”
Me: “Son, I really think that’s just a rumor. That doesn’t sound real.”
Spoiler: I was wrong. But he doesn’t know that, so it’s fine.
TB: “What if I fall asleep in class and then I wake up with a tattoo?!”
Me: “You shouldn’t be falling asleep in class.”
TB: “MOM! Sometimes the class is just too boring – like Enrichment. What if I fall asleep and wake up tattooed? What then?!”
Me: “Okay. That is also not how tattoos work. At worst, you’ll wake up with a penis Sharpied onto your face. It’ll wash off in a week. It’s fine. It’ll all be fine.”
TB: “I heard they threw a cop over the balcony”
Me: “That happened once and he’s fine. Didn’t even break anything. He was just a security guard.”
Me: “Just stay away from the railings. Stick to the middle of the halls when you’re on the second floor.”
TB: “Why do I feel like you just aren’t taking me serious here!”
Me: “It will be fine. You’re a good person who attracts other good people. And if it is really awful for you, we will figure something new out. You got this.”
The insane and personally terrifying worst-case scenarios were something to behold – but this was just another reminder that The Boy is definitely a cut and paste version of me. Our brains lead us down some wacky and dark mental paths.
And that’s pretty much how the rest of our summer went: random spirals to calm self assurance that it will all be fine. (my cut and paste child). When he finally told his best friend his unfortunate, terrible, no good news, being the good friend he is, Bud joined in the spiral. “What if you make friends and find out it’s actually a gang and they make you join?” “Maybe you can look for a cool cartel or just be a friend of the gang. Like a guest star.” “OHMY GODWHATIFYOUGETCAUGHTINARIOT?!” He’s such a good friend. Thanks, Bud.
the boy is a freshman (officially): first day
Here we go! New clothes, fresh cut and two (or more) mini anxiety attacks later and he was [still not] ready. Didn’t matter, it was go time. I dropped him off after making him promise to text me updates. Truly though – we were both a little panicky. New school. Not knowing a single soul. FRESHMAN! There was a lot happening at once.
1st set of texts:
I’m at lunch.
How’s it going so far?
I want to go home.
You’re halfway through.
Are you going to pick me up?
Yes. The meeting spot. I should be on that side by the time you get to the gas station.
Ok. Please don’t be too long I just want to go home and cuddle the dogs.
2nd set of texts:
I’m going to try to find where the bus is
Ok. I will still pick you up this week but it will be good to know where pickup is and what bus to take. Ask at the office.
Ok I will.
I can’t find the bus.
It won’t be there yet anyway.
I can’t find any buses
Why would you?
To go home.
Son, do you think school is over?
Yes I’m walking to the gas station now.
School isn’t over! You still have 2 classes go back?
Look at your schedule and go back!!
3rd set of texts
Are you on your way yet? Please be on your way. I’m walking now.
Yes I’m on my way. I am actually very close are you almost to the gas station?
I don’t think so I’m still walking.
I’m coming down the street to find you then.
Hey! Turn around and turn the corner. I am parked in front of the first house.
the freshman tried boosting cars and skipping class
So I’m waiting for him to turn the corner, treat him to some nuggets and hear about his day. I see him turn the corner and… keep walking. HUH?
I’m watching him from the rearview mirror go past our car and try to get into the car across the street. I quickly rolled down the window “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” Just in time too because that car was unlocked. Now I would just like to point out that even though both cars were the same color, they looked nothing alike. Nothing.
He heard me, looked down like ‘OH SHIT’ and ran over.
When The Boy got in the car, he already looked like he was ready to cry. “Can we just go home? Please? I just want to go home.” I didn’t even get a chance to ask how the rest of his day went. And I wanted to cry with him. Oh that face…
So I told him he didn’t have to look around for a gang to join. He ditched school and tried to boost a car on the first day of high school. With that street cred, he could start his own. I got a small smile out of him.
hot out hideout
Me: “Ok, do you want to detour for a Dr. Pepper and some nuggets maybe?”
So, I asked him how it went. He didn’t want to talk about it. I told him he didn’t have to tell me how the day went, but maybe just how he liked his classes.
So far, Tech Theater was his favorite class.
Me: “So you made it back in the building? Did anyone stop you or ask why you left? Didn’t anyone see you leaving campus in the middle of the day?!”
TB: “No. I just walked out.”
Me: “Didn’t you notice no other kids were leaving?”
TB: “Mom I just wanted to leave and it already felt like a long day. I really thought I was done.”
Me: “Understandable. Did you explain to your French teacher what happened? What did they say?”
TB: “I was too embarrassed to go so I waited for the bell to ring.”
Me: “So you were just hiding in the bathroom until the bell rang?!”
TB: “Oh. My. God. I could have hidden in the bathroom! I stayed outside. It was so hot!”
Oh my beautiful tropical fish of a child.
the freshman reviewed a no star day
I went through each class asking for his day one review/rating. So far it seemed okay. His teachers seemed nice, but some seemed boring. Every teacher he asked for help finding a class was nice.
Then we got to his English class.
TB: “Hmm. I don’t remember that one too well.”
Me: “Son, it was your first class of the day. Literally how you started the day.”
TB: “Oh. I was wondering why I had algebra twice. I thought it was weird”
Oh sweet baby Jesus! This kid!! Beautiful tropical fish. Apparently he walked into the wrong class (darn that dyslexia!) and he didn’t notice his name wasn’t called out, nor did the teacher notice she had an extra kid in her class. There’s that classic public school overcrowding for ya.
We cracked some jokes and my sweet summer child was smiling by the time we got home. Laughing even.
And he did have one good thing to say about high school:
“Mom, I left for lunch! Like they just let us walk out of there and trusted I’d be back! It was crazy!”
I let the fact that he tried to leave again and not go back slide. Let him have this moment of joy for the prison school.
Truly though, that laugh put my whole body and soul at ease because let me tell y’all – I WAS STRESSED ALL DAY FOR HIM. I know he’s a resilient young man, but he’s my boy and he was sad, scared and hurting. And then we laughed it away because he’s a twisted little soul like me. Copy and paste.
On The Boy’s first day of school as a FRESHMAN, he got lost several times, took two math classes and zero languages. Ditched school and tried to steal a car.
the freshman tried it again
1st set of texts with the freshman
I found the buses
Ok. I’m still picking you up, but good to know for next week.
They’re different than the middle school buses.
And kinda far from school
Never mind those are city buses
Oh dear lord I can’t believe this boy is a freshman.
I AM PICKING YOU UP!
Tuesday ended up a better day, despite almost taking a city bus to who knows where. The Boy did not get lost, let his English teacher know what happened. He said she laughed and said it happens. Freshmen, AMIRITE? He didn’t forget how many classes he had – attended ALL of them at their scheduled time. AND he even talked to two other kids. Not bad so far.
Me: “What did your French teacher say about you missing yesterday?”
TB: “Nothing really, but she’s hard to understand. She has has such a heavy accent. It’s weird.”
Me: “Is it a … FRENCH accent?”
Sweet baby James – the mental face palm moments with this guy.
TB: “Ohhhh, that would make sense. Oh yeah and I saw Bud.”
Me: “What? Where? Did you FaceTime or something?”
TB: “No. In the front office. He was registering.”
Me: “What happened? I thought he was going to the golden school like all your other friends.”
TB: “He said he went and they didn’t have any record of him and so now he has to go to prison.”
Me: “Sucks for him. He was so excited.”
TB: “I know. ”
Me: “GREAT for you though.”
TB: “I KNOW!”
the freshman now…
It’s only gotten better since then, folks. He has his bestie at his side and has even talked to new people. He knows where his classes are and makes sure he goes. The bus pick up location has been secured (NOT city buses) . He remembers to go back from lunch time where they just LET HIM WALK OUT (because the boy is a FRESHMAN – IN HIGH SCHOOL!) And best of all, it’s no longer the prison school. The Boy and Bud genuinely love it. Or else they like prison?? I’ll worry about that later.
As always, it’s an adventure with this kid and never ever boring. OMG THE BOY IS A FRESHMAN!
I’ll keep y’all posted!
Bye for now,
Psst: I still have hopes of manifesting a better year.